


To Carry

by Shorm (Bdoing), Vinnocent



Series: Humanity Is Watching [3]
Category: Animorphs - Katherine A. Applegate, Firefly
Genre: Blood and Gore, Death Humor, F/M, Murder, Violent Triggers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-09
Updated: 2014-10-10
Packaged: 2018-02-20 10:33:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,791
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2425496
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bdoing/pseuds/Shorm, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vinnocent/pseuds/Vinnocent
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tobias, Rachel, and Alex take Alan's body to Loren, where old secrets near the light. Jake and Cassie warn Michelle, Walter, and Sarah of trouble to come.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you to Shorm for translating the Japanese phrases.

> _When you can’t walk, you crawl. And when you can’t crawl, you find someone to carry you._

Now…  
As Tobias headed out to the crew cabins, he stopped on a catwalk over the cargo and sighed exasperatedly at the sight below him. He changed direction and made his way down to Alex, who had yet again opened the hermetic seal on the bio-crate they’d found for Alan. “Man, I’m trying to be sensitive, here, I really am,” Tobias said, “but you’re gonna let the rot out.”

Alex grimaced but didn’t look up at him. “I apologize,” he said. “I just… I keep forgetting what he looks like. I want to know the face he died with.”

Tobias hesitated momentarily on the stairs. “Uh… I don’t mean to be rude, but… is English your first language?” he asked. “Because what you said was really weird, and I get the idea it wasn’t supposed to be.”

Alex finally glanced up at him. “Which part?” he asked.

“‘Face he died with,’” Tobias informed him.

Alex nodded and turned back to his brother. “Yes, English is not my first language,” he said. “What I mean to say is… I never actually knew my brother.”

Tobias arched an eyebrow. “Really?” he said, continuing down the steps toward Alex.

Alex nodded. “He left before I was born,” Alex said. “Before I was conceived, actually. He knew our parents intended to generate me, but never knew of me, specifically. Of him, I had holos, but he… looked different.”

“Well, it’s been a long time,” Tobias said, sitting down next to him.

Alex nodded absently. “It has,” he agreed. “He left on a military tour. Out this way. They just… didn’t come back. No one knew what had become of him. It was assumed that he was dead. I was meant to follow in his footsteps. In the military, I mean. He only ever got as far as a… a cadet. I, not being dead, obviously climbed higher. And, at first… I was proud to do so. But the more I accomplished, the more wrong it felt. I had been told to fill a footprint that wasn’t actually there. Eventually, I came to realization that what I really wanted was to let him make his own footprints again.”

“So you went looking for him?” Tobias asked.

Alex nodded again. “Yes. I left and searched many years. I learned some things about him, but nothing useful. I had a name. A face. No location. No gossip. No one knew anything.”

“Well, at least, now you can bring him home,” Tobias said.

Alex shook his head. “No,” he said. “That avenue is now closed. Better to bring him to… your mother.” Alex scowled. “Whatever connection it is that she has.”

Tobias frowned. “You’re from Shadow, aren’t you?” he asked. When Alex looked at him curiously, he continued, “I, uh, I don’t mean to pry, it’s just… You talk about home like it’s a place that doesn’t exist. And the timeline kind of fits. And I know that, in general, people who lived there but weren’t there when it got blown up mostly took to wandering.”

Alex returned his gaze to his brother. “Yes,” he said. He said nothing more.

“Right. Well…” Tobias moved to get up. “I should probably…”

“You can stay,” Alex said quietly. “If you want.”

Tobias considered the stranger for a moment. Then, he sat down again.

－ －

Then…  
“So,” Cassie said, peeking into the suddenly very active guest room. “You must be one of the exodus kids.”

“No, I’m the painter,” the girl snipped, angrily stuffing various clothing items into the old, 21st century chest of drawers that had been passed down from Cassie’s great grandma. God knows how anyone got it on an Ark.

Cassie grimaced. Part of her felt bad for already screwing up, but the rest of her was pretty damn certain she hadn’t said anything wrong.

The girl shoved another shirt in the drawer then spun angrily to Cassie. “And it is _not_ an exodus, okay? This isn’t Earth That Was. I didn’t get here on an ark. There’s no devastation--"

“I think Shadow might disagree,” Cassie snapped a bit bitterly, expertly flinging the lodger off her high horse.

Her anger fell into embarrassment, and she turned away. “Whatever,” she grunted. “Point is that as soon as Mom gets sense back into her, we’re headed straight back to Persephone.” She walked back to the open suitcase on the bed. “So there’s no point getting _attached_.”

Cassie rolled her eyes and moved away from the door, giving up. “I’ll try to restrain myself,” she groaned.

－ －

Now...  
Cassie waited patiently by the cortex screen as the Blue Sun logo whirled idly. Finally, her mother’s face appeared on the screen, and Cassie immediately beamed back at her. “Hi, Mom!” she said. “Sorry, I wasn’t able to update you immediately, we had to switch routes suddenly and go black.”

Michelle Sosanya frowned with concern. “Is everything okay?” she asked, voice tight.

“It’s fine, Mom,” she said. “We were acting on a distress signal and, unsure of what we were walking into, cut communication so we couldn’t be sussed out before we got there.”

Mrs. Sosanya’s frown did not entirely abate, knowing that what Cassie really meant was that the rescue had been sketchy and the crew hadn’t wanted to be caught by Alliance. “But you’re coming home now?” she asked.

“Yep!” Cassie said, nodding excitedly. “Rachel and I have missed you guys a lot. Um, but, on the business side of things… If you’ve got work for us, then you have a half crew to help. But we can’t take any other jobs right now.”

Michelle looked confused. “But this town’s half your Rim profit.”

“I know, but we ate time on the rescue, and… um, Rachel and Tobias are gonna be busy… So…” Cassie tugged at her short locs self-consciously. “Um… If you could do me the favor, I need you to ask Loren to hail us? She keeps _accidentally_ leaving her sourcebox off, so…”

“Did something happen to Tobias?” Michelle gasped.

“No!” Cassie cried, before remembering to tug on her earlobe in signal to stop asking questions. A system that Marco had worked out after only a week of Cassie living on _Jian Seng_. “No, um, we just… Tobias needs to talk to her.”

Michelle sighed and nodded. “Alright,” she said, putting her hands up in defeat. Cassie hated when she did that. “Alright. When are you landing?”

“Round about dawn, your time,” Cassie said. “But, uh, we’ll probably desert dock. Closer to Loren.”

Michelle frowned disapprovingly and wrung her hands. “Alright,” she said. “Well, be home by nine, and we’ll have breakfast for you and…?”

“Just me an’ Jake, I think,” said Cassie. “Rachel’s goin’ with Tobias, and you know Marco ain’t sociable unless he needs to be.”

Michelle nodded again. “I missed you, honey. I’ll be happy to see you in the world again,” she said with the thin smile of a woman who never got to stop worrying.

“Me, too,” Cassie said with a genuine smile. She reached forward and ended the transmission.

She flopped onto her back and mulled things over for a bit before getting up again and heading up out of her cabin. She walked out toward the other side of the ship, past the weapon storage barrels, and to the door of the infirmary. She tapped lightly on the door and waved to Erek when he glanced up. He motioned that she could come in.

Not wanting to wake Tom, though his current state probably had more to do with drugs than natural rhythms, Cassie closed the door carefully behind her. “Hey,” she whispered, smiling meekly. “I thought you’d like to know that we’ll be landin’ in a few hours, if you wanna get a nap in ’forehand.”

Erek raised an eyebrow at her from where he sat on the tile floor with his back against the cabinets. “Is that to say that I’ll actually be able to leave?” he asked wryly.

Cassie scowled. “We ain’t kidnapped ya,” she said.

He didn’t look like he trusted her. “Why not?” he asked. He motioned to Tom’s unconscious form. “I know your secret, _and_ I’m helpful to it.”

“Less helpful if you don’t want to be here,” said Cassie. “And it puts us out to be cartin’ around an extra passenger for no reason.”

“So why not shove me out the airlock?” he asked. “Your pilot doesn’t seem against it.”

“ _Tobias_?” Cassie laughed. “Tobias is just a nerd with a big mouth. He rarely escalates into a brawl, and when he does, he’s on the floor in three seconds. ’Sides, we’d never let him. We may seem like a bunch of vicious and felonious miscreants, and we _are_ , but we do prefer honey to vinegar.”

Erek couldn’t help a small smirk of amusement. “Tactical amicability?” he asked. “Did your Companion come up with that?”

Cassie grinned confidently. “Now what makes you think he’s the only smart one on this ship?” she asked.

He glanced to her, reading her carefully, then laughed. “You know… I think, perhaps, there is more to all of you than I may have initially presumed,” he admitted.

“There usually is,” she said kindly, turning back to the door.

“You know,” Erek interrupted. “Catching flies with honey instead of vinegar usually has to do with manipulating people to get what you want.”

Cassie glanced back and shrugged. “I s’pose it does.”

“Are you trying to trap me, Ms. Sosanya?” he asked.

She shook her head and smiled. “No need,” she said, stepping through the door. “You’ll stay of your own accord. You like us.”

－ －

Then…  
The girls stood opposite each other in the dark night, only the light of a single moon highlighting the still glistening blood splattered across Rachel’s face, chest, and arms. They stood there, staring at each other from opposite sides of a corpse and not knowing what to do.

Finally, Cassie asked, “Are you okay?”

“Are you going to tell?” Rachel asked, and Cassie could hear the terror in her voice. Cassie wondered if this was more or less terror than Rachel had felt, running into the thief in the dark.

“Not if you don’t want to,” said Cassie. “It was self-defense, though. I saw that.” She stepped forward bravely, reaching out to request Rachel’s knife.

Rachel looked down as though only just realizing that she had the weapon in her hand. She handed it over. She just kept staring at Cassie, as if waiting for some kind of cue.

“Are you okay?” Cassie asked again.

Rachel looked down at her assailant. Slowly, she shook her head. “No,” she squeaked. Before, she could stop them, tears were streaming down her face in great big sobs, and Cassie immediately rushed forward to scoop her up in her arms, tucking her face in against blood-drenched hair.

“Ssh, it’s okay,” she whispered. “It’s okay. The world will be here tomorrow.”

－ －

Now…  
She just stood there. Waiting.

Awkwardly, Alex stepped forward, away from the side of the bio-crate. He extended a hand to her in a stiff, quick, robotic movement. “Uh, Mrs. Matsumoto－”

“Miss,” she corrected. She turned to him, scowling. “I know you?” she asked, as Rachel rapidly gestured for him to put his hand down.

“I’m… My name is…” He seemed to be having difficulty pulling the right words out. “Alex,” he said at last. “They said that... that my brother requested to be brought to you?”

Loren’s eyebrows went up. She turned toward Tobias, where he stood off to the side clutching at Rachel in his uncertainty. “You didn’t mention,” she said grimly.

Tobias shrugged. “I wasn’t sure what was okay to say on the Cortex,” he admitted. He spoke extremely quietly as though hoping she wouldn’t hear. “This kind of seemed… Independent, so－”

“It ain’t Independent,” Loren snarled suddenly. “It ain’t nothin’.” She spun back to Alex and shoved a finger at his collarbone. “I don’t know it. I don’t know you. So how ’bout you haul your blue ass straight off my piece of rock, and take your shit elsewhere?” She turned away from them and stalked back toward the tiny, ramshackle farmhouse.

“What?” Tobias demanded. “Loren!” She didn’t stop. “Loren!” He ran off after her. “Oi! Okaasan! Matte!”

Rachel glanced back at the ship, currently only containing Marco and Tom, then turned uneasily at Alex. “So…” she said, twisting her arms awkwardly. “Just you, me, and the dead guy.”

“Should we… go after them?” Alex asked uncertainly.

Rachel shook her head. “Nah,” she said, sitting gracelessly on the bio-crate. “That looks like family business. Best let them work that out first.”

Uneasily, Alex sat on the dirt next to the box, falling as soon as he was half-way down. Rachel laughed loudly and told him he had the legs of a foal. Alex blushed and fidgeted. “I suppose I must spend to much time in space,” he mumbled quietly.

Rachel raised an eyebrow. “Whatcha mean? Gravity rotor on your ship was just fine.”

“Uh…”

“Anyway, I don’t care,” she said, waving a hand dismissively. “I’m more curious about that blue thing?”

“Uh…”

“If you’ve got Alliance history, you can tell me,” she said, smiling beautifully. “I ain’t fought in no war.”

Alex shook his head. “I really don’t know where she got that impression,” he said, honestly. “I am… I am very much not Alliance.”

“‘Very much’?” Rachel repeated. She whistled appreciatively. “Wow, that’s a lot.”

Alex looked her with confusion.

After a moment, Rachel laughed. “Wow, you don’t have much of a sense of humor, do you?”

“I am afraid I do not,” he said stiffly. They both turned at the sound of a slamming door to see Tobias and his mother take their shouting out onto the porch. Rachel had no idea what they were saying, as she couldn’t translate “distant, pissed off Japanese.” A moment later, Loren went back inside and Tobias followed, slamming the door again. “Is this normal?” Alex asked.

Rachel snorted. “Where did you grow up?” she asked.

Alex shrugged.

“Didn’t know Shadow had a place called” and Rachel mimicked his shrug.

“I can tell you’re being mean,” Alex said hollowly.

Her face fell. “Sorry,” she mumbled, and she slid off the bio-crate and onto the ground. After a long moment, she held out her hand to him.

Alex eyed it suspiciously. “What are you doing?” he demanded.

“Offering to hold your hand because you’re upset and I’m not a _complete_ shithead,” she said, rolling her eyes. “Come on, you won’t catch anything.”

Still confused, Alex reached out and put his hand in hers. She forced a weak smile and squeezed his hand briefly. Strangely, Alex found himself somewhat comforted.


	2. Chapter 2

Then…  
All through the day, he was quiet, polite, reserved. He helped with the chores, and if there weren’t chores for him, he’d come up with something.

At night, he screamed. Not one of the seven people living in the ranchhouse intended for a family half that size were having a good night’s sleep. But no one had the heart to complain to the soldier on their couch.

When Cassie walked into the kitchen, wiping sleep out of her eyes at half past noon, she found Jake sitting grumpily across the table from Rachel, who was attempting to replicate hand signs from a book. “I don’t know that one,” he said in an unamused monotone.

“Wait, I think I did it wrong,” Rachel mumbled, still facing the book in her lap with her hands out in front of her.

“I said I don’t know that one,” he repeated, snapping slightly.

“Just wait a sec, I’ve almost got it.”

“GORRAMMIT, RACHEL, YOU’RE NOT THE DEAF ONE!” Jake snarled, making his cousin jump.

Okay, so he was _usually_ quiet, polite, and reserved.

Cassie tried to come around into his field of vision to let him know she was there, but the two were already arguing too heatedly to notice anyone else. Sighing, Cassie went to fetch a cup of coffee from the counter behind him, finding it only lukewarm. “Hey, when was this－?" She cut herself off with a sigh, realizing that Rachel would never hear her over their argument. What was even the point of yelling? Half of Jake’s side was repeating that he didn’t understand her and that she at least needed to face him.

Sighing again, Cassie reached out to tap the nearest shoulder for attention. And immediately found herself in a headlock, the coffee pitcher lying shattered on the floor.

“JAKE, WHAT THE FUCK?!” Rachel screamed, on her feet but not advancing, unsure of him.

Jake immediately released Cassie, backing off with raised hands and wide eyes. “I… Sorry, I…”

Cassie rubbed her throat, but nothing seemed out of order. She closed her eyes, breathed deeply, and said, clearly and facing him, “It’s okay. I should’ve known better. We both messed up.” She smiled and gestured to the coffee pot. “You can help clean up.”

Jake took a second to figure out the message, then nodded quickly, beat red, and moved past her to pick up the broken coffee pot bits. Cassie turned to Rachel, who was watching them with a scowl. “Cassie, that was _not_ okay,” Rachel hissed.

Cassie shrugged uneasily. “He didn’t hurt me.”

“Not by his own decidin’,” said Rachel. She shook her head and leaned back in her chair, rubbing her eyes. “I have no idea what we’re doing.” She turned to her best friend again. “And he can _not_ do that around Jordan and Sarah. _To_ Jordan or Sarah.”

Cassie nodded. She had to admit, that was a point. “I’ll see about getting him set up somewhere else. See if there’s anyone helpful in town.”

Rachel frowned at Jake’s back. “You sure he can be helped?” she said.

Cassie put her hand on Rachel’s shoulder. “He’s okay,” she said. “He’s alive, and he’s back, and he’s with family. He’ll be okay.”

－ －

Now…  
Rachel carefully eased open the screen door, glancing inside to see Tobias alone in the front room, curled up in threadbare armchair. “So…” she said carefully.

Tobias just shrugged. After a moment, he reached out for her, and she advanced from the door, taking his hand and sitting on the arm of the chair, curling herself around him protectively. Finally, Tobias asked, “Where’s Alex?”

“Watching the body,” said Rachel. “Has she changed her mind, yet?”

He just shrugged again. “I don’t know. She’s definitely hiding something, which is a thing in itself. I mean… We’ve never been close, you know that, but I never thought she was hiding shit. That had seemed important to her. To keep honest. Now…”

“If she has nothing to say, then what sparked the screaming match?” she prompted.

Tobias leaned forward, out of her arms, burying his face in his hands with his elbows on his knees. He sighed deeply. “I’ve not said anything to Alex yet,” he mumbled. “But… ever since Alan walked onboard… it has not escaped my notice that… he…”

“Looks like you?” Rachel completed for him.

He nodded. He leaned back again, gulping in air and blinking rapidly. She rubbed his shoulders patiently. He shook his head and said, “I thought… I kept saying, it’s just a weird coincidence. I’m so mixed, I probably look like a lot of people. Except I don’t. I’ve never looked like anyone but Loren before. And then… Then Chapman says to take him to her? She acts cagey about it?” He made a vague noise of distress and confusion. “Suddenly, everything she’s ever done in my life is cast into doubt.”

“She’s still your mother, Tobias,” she said quietly.

Tobias just shook his head in dismay and settled himself against her. “You know she never said he was a deadbeat?” he mumbled. “I always assumed. But if I said anything, she’d just tell me that he didn’t know or that it wasn’t worth thinking on, and I just thought she was being kind, but Loren’s never been kind about a thing in the world, and he’s working some kind of Independent edge, while she won’t touch the conflict with a ten meter spear, though she’s never made a secret of her disdain for the Alliance, and I just…” Tobias tossed up his hands. “What the _fuck_ is happening?”

“Has Alex said anything?” Rachel asked.

He shook his head. “I don’t know think anyone knew,” he said. “As to whether he’s figured it out… He looks at me strange sometimes, but I don’t think he’s put the puzzle together yet. He’s never seen Alan until recently, so it doesn’t strike the same familiarity for him as it does for me.”

Rachel made a noise of discontent, and Tobias looked up at her, puzzled. “What?” he asked.

“It’s just… Well, you look like Alan,” she said, looking down at him. “But Alex… doesn’t.”

Tobias shrugged. “There’s a lot of explanations for that,” he said. “Half brothers. Adopted. Figuratively brothers.” He shrugged again. “He’s upset enough that I believe him.”

“Yeah, I suppose you’re right,” Rachel said. “It’s just with all the hiding of things, his mysteries strike a bit… off-putting.”

“I trust him about half as much as I trust you,” Tobias mumbled. When he sensed Rachel stiffen, he glanced up at her and smirked at her conflicted features. “That’s a lot, doofus.”

“I knew that!” Rachel cried defensively, and he rolled his eyes. She looked around. “So where is she, then?”

“She went off to feed the chickens,” he said. “She needs time to cool off before I press her further.” He looked up to her. “Wanna head to your place?”

Rachel shrugged. “I’d like to call them, at least, but I don’t want to abandon Alex here with a lady he doesn’t know that doesn’t like him. Besides, only shuttle left is Marco’s, and it reeks of incense.” She elbowed him playfully. “Besides, this means that Cassie and Jake have to deal with all the romantic questionnaires by themselves,” she reminded him, and he laughed cruelly at that.

Over at the Sosanyas’, Rachel was being proven not-wrong.

“DID YOU BRING ME A PRESENT? WHERE’S RACHEL? WHERE’S TOBIAS? ARE YOU MARRIED YET? DO I HAVE NIECE YET? WILL YOU MAKE ME A NIECE AND NAME HER AFTER ME? WHERE IS MY PRESENT?”

Jake glowered down at Sarah. “Okay, first of all, I’m your cousin, not your brother. It wouldn’t be a niece. Secondly, you are twenty-one years old, and you gorram know better,” he corrected her while Cassie gave him a look that very clearly read “I can’t believe _those_ are the two points you chose to make.”

“I know _nothing_ ,” Sarah insisted brightly, hugging Cassie tightly around the waist. “But seriously, where’s my other sister? You can’t just bring me one sister, Jake.”

“Cassie’s not your sister; don’t make this weird,” Jake complained. “And Rachel’s at Loren’s. She’ll be by later, probably."

Finally, Walter Sosanya entered from the kitchen at the back of the house, extending a hand to greet Jake, who shook it happily. “It’s good to see you again, Jake,” he said with a smile, before expertly prying Sarah off his daughter so he could hug her properly.

“Hi, Dad,” said Cassie. “I missed you, too.”

“We should head into the kitchen,” Walter said, releasing her. “Your mom’s still working on breakfast. And I should be helping her. I think she was expecting more people.”

Cassie rolled her eyes. “She’s _always_ expecting more people. I think having four growing girls was her greatest delight.” She made sure to say that loudly enough that there was a possibility of her mother hearing. The indignant shout of “Hey!” that crossed the house said that Michelle had.

Jake made sure the front door was locked securely behind them. “We, uh, we actually have some things to talk about as well,” he said, running his hand through his hair nervously. “Did you…?”

“Yeah, when Cassie gave Michelle the ‘shut up’ signal, we thought you’d probably want security,” Walter said, crossing his arms and frowning disapprovingly. “We’ve done a full sweep of the house, and we’ve got the electronet up. So out with it. What’s Rachel brought now?”

Jake swallowed and glanced at Cassie who reached out and squeezed his hand supportively. “She… She brought Tom,” he said. “She saved him.”

Walter’s arms fell to his side, staring in confusion. Sarah kept opening and closing her mouth in a manner that was quite reminiscent of a fish.

“And it’s only a matter of time before they look for him with us, with everyone we know,” said Jake. “I’m… I’m grateful, but there were costs that she and Marco did not entirely account for, and… I need to make you knowing of them.”

－ －

Then…  
“Have you seen your sister?” Cassie asked, tucking her head into the kitchen, where Sarah was busily mixing batter.

“Which one?” Sarah asked curiously.

Cassie rolled her eyes. “The one we ask on,” she said.

Sarah shrugged. “Rachel went out the back a while ago when the delivery landed,” she said, pointing to the back door.

“What? The delivery’s here?” said Cassie. “Why didn’t you say nothin’?”

“Rachel said she’d handle it,” Sarah said, looking confused.

“What? Rachel don’t have the ‘Sosanya’ to sign with! She knows that!” Cassie objected, but Sarah only shrugged. Annoyed and confused, Cassie headed out of the back door, storming out toward the landing dock. _Doke_ , a Wren-class light bulk transport ship that specialized in ferrying supplies around Aberdeen and its moons, was still parked out there. It was flown by Tobias Matsumoto, though it was owned by his uncle. Even from a distance, she could tell the engine was cold. How long had he been there?

As she came closer, she saw the figures leaning against the side of the ship. As usual, Tobias had his hands buried in his pockets and was slouching. However, _unlike_ usual, he was smiling and laughing, which, of course he was doing, because he was with Rachel, who was leaning in way too close and touching his arm unnecessarily.

“Exactly how long have you been _not_ working?!” Cassie demanded angrily as she continued up to the ship. Tobias nearly jumped out of his skin and immediately scrambled off to the rear of the ship to detach the cargo container, apologizing profusely.

Rachel gave Cassie a quizzical look and walked casually forward to meet her. “What?” Rachel asked, glancing over her shoulder to make sure Tobias was out of hearing range. “Did you already like him?”

“What?! No!” Cassie cried. “He’s－ I－ No!”

“Then what are you worked up over?” Rachel asked.

“Because you’re flirting _on the clock_! Everyone here earns their keep, remember?” Cassie demanded.

“It weren’t that long,” Rachel huffed. “Call it a break!”

“His engine’s cold.”

“His engine’s a grapefruit.”

Behind them, the cargo container loudly smacked into the ground, making the girls jump. Tobias ignored them, moving around the opposite side of the ship, so Rachel returned her attention to Cassie. “Cassie, it’s not a big deal,” she insisted.

“Not for you,” Cassie snipped as quietly as she could. “But if Tobias doesn’t make his rounds in a reasonable amount of hours, his uncle will _flip his shit_. The sort of immense shit-flipping that will have tongues wagging.” At Rachel’s cowed expression, Cassie pushed one step further to seal the deal. “You could have any boy you wanted, and you know it. Do you have to pick the ones that are the worst off by you?”

“You gonna sign for this?” Tobias barked from next to the container, holding out a panel to Cassie.

“Yeah, sorry,” Cassie said, hurrying away from Rachel’s side to take the panel and sign.

“Thanks,” Tobias mumbled, jerking it out of her hands when she finished. “By the way, I’d appreciate if you minded yours and let me mind mine, instead of _wagging your tongue_ about what you think I _should_ be doing.”

Cassie’s jaw was on the floor. “I－!”

“My mom’s blind; I’m not deaf,” he snapped.

“Uh…” Cassie floundered, but Tobias ignored her and climbed back up into the cockpit. From there, he motioned for her to step back away, then slammed the door shut. Cassie quickly retreated from _Doke_ , back to Rachel’s side.

“So… We both fucked up?” Rachel asked, confused.

“Yuh-huh,” Cassie moaned, mortified. “Oh god, I pissed off our delivery boy. This is gonna get so awkward.”

With a laugh, Rachel slung an arm over Cassie’s shoulders and lead her back to the house. “Nah, we’ll bake him cookies, and he’ll get over it,” she assured her best friend.

“Cookies?” Cassie demanded, disbelieving.

Rachel sneered mockingly. “Cass, my bestest of buds, there are two methods by which one may earn the immediate forgiveness of a boy,” she announced. “And of those two, only one is actually worth the effort.”

“Ew,” Cassie groaned, pulling away. “Assuming the second is what I think you’re implying, I’m under the impression Tobias doesn’t do that.”

Rachel stopped short on the path. When Cassie turned back to her, she was just sort of standing there, blinking in confusion as she sorted that fact out in her brain, trying to figure out the proper reaction. Finally, she settled on “Huh.”

“Huh?” Cassie demanded.

Rachel nodded and continued her path again. “Huh,” she agreed.

“What does that mean?” Cassie asked, scrambling after her.

“Dunno yet,” Rachel answered honestly.

Cassie glowered at her friend’s back. “You’re gonna keep flirting, aren’t you?”

“Until one of us gets bored,” Rachel promised.

“You make romance sound like a game of chicken,” Cassie complained, though she couldn’t keep the amusement out of her voice. Rachel just winked back at her over her shoulder.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to Shorm for translating! English translation of what Loren says is in the end notes.

Now…  
Pancakes burned on the stove as Michelle, Walter, and Sarah all stared at Jake and Cassie. Cassie swallowed nervously and squeezed her boyfriend’s hand again. Sarah glanced over at the stove. “Mom, you’re burning the－”

“Shit!” Michelle quickly tossed the pan into the sink and turned on the water, joining a cloud of steam to the cloud of smoke.

Walter glanced at his wife, then at the two smugglers standing before him. “Should I… Should I call Jordan?” he asked.

Cassie frowned and turned to Jake. “I don’t really wanna keep it from her, but… I’m not sure we should ask a rabbi to lie?”

Jake rubbed his temple. “We’ll drop by her position after Tobias is done,” he said. “Give her the option of knowing and being put in a bad position or of not knowing.”

Sarah sat down at the table next to her foster father. “I…” She rubbed her eyes, still trying to sort out the facts. “So he… I mean he never…?”

Jake sighed and shrugged. “I don’t know what, exactly, he signed up for,” he admitted. “I know he was plenty happy to go to that academy. I doubt he wanted to be a mindless robot.”

“Is he… mindless?” asked Michelle. “Did they really…?”

Jake shook his head and spread his hands. “He’s responsive to stimuli. He appears interested in the world around him. But he’s unable to communicate. He’s triggered by the smallest things. I don’t know how much longer we can keep him on board.” With a tired, weary drag to his movements, he pulled out a chair and sat opposite Walter and Sarah. “To be honest, that’s not the thing I’m most concerned for right now.”

“It’s not?” Sarah asked, surprised.

“They’ll come,” Michelle said, frowning.

Cassie nodded. “Jake’s his brother, and a former corporal of the Independent Faction. He’s the first place they’ll look,” she explained. She spread her hands. “And if we should somehow successfully hide Tom from their inspections, the next place they’ll go is Broadside. Everyone we trust the most is here.”

Walter nodded. “Then, obviously, where you need to go is not-Broadside,” he said.

Jake quirked an eyebrow. “Uh, no offense, sir, but I didn’t come here for tactics. I came here to make sure our people were prepared.”

Walter gestured to Cassie. “You still flyin’ with him?” he asked, and Cassie blinked and stuttered out an “um” that made it clear that it had never even occurred to her that there was another option. Walter nodded again, taking that as an answer, and returned his attention to Jake. “And I know for damn certain that Rachel will. ‘Til she settles back with Naomi, she’s still mine to look after, too. Which means that while your first priority at the moment may be to make sure that we’re prepared, my first priority is to make sure that you are. You ain’t haulin’ my girls head-first into fray without a damn good rifle.”

A slow smile played at the edge of Jake’s lips. “Yes, sir,” he said.

－ －

In the center of town, Erek walked to an old, neglected, and crumbling church. A barely legible sign at the front dedicated the church to a saint who didn’t exist.

Erek eased open the heavy, warped door, and stepped inside, greeted by the sight of boarded up windows, graffitied pews, water stains, and slightly-less-faded spots where pilfered decor had once been. He walked forward, down the middle aisle, until the church flickered and disappeared, replaced instead with an almost believable holographic image of the home he’d left behind so many millennia ago. In the center of this false park stood a statue. The statue was real. It was of a bipedal canine-like being, fairly short in stature, compared to the majority of humans.

Its name was Memory.

Erek stepped up the statue and pressed his head to its head, allowing the upload of his data to the core system. And then, he sent a request.

－ －

Tobias woke to Rachel jostling him. He wiped sleep out of his eyes and looked up to see his mother waiting by the door with her arms crossed. “Your shuttle has returned, so I expect you’re wantin’ to take off soon,” she said.

Tobias scowled. “Loren…”

“So I suppose it’s now or never, isn’t it?” she interrupted, wringing her hands.

He hesitated for a moment, then stood. “Yeah,” he said. He moved to the door and took her arm, then lead her out the door. She didn’t really need it; she was plenty familiar with navigating her own land. But he’d learned by then how to read his mother.

As he lead her back out to _Jian Seng_ he noticed that Alex was walking back to the bio-crate, having left it alone recently. Well, he supposed the boy had to pee sometime.

Alex waited nervously next to the crate as they approached. Rachel hurried forward a bit to go ahead and open the crate. Once they were at its side, Tobias helped his mother kneel next to the crate, and Rachel and Alex removed the cover.

With a trembling hand, Loren reached out and touched the body. Her hand then slowly worked up to his face. Carefully, she groped at his features, reading his face. Then, with a small sob of unrestrained grief, she bowed over him and pulled him into her arms, sobbing against his cold shoulder. “Hontou baka da,” she whispered, voice cracking.

Tobias reached out and rubbed her back patiently. Finally, Loren released the body again, carefully placing it back in the crate. “You,” she said, pointing in Alex’s general direction. “The brother. What’s your name?”

“Alex Fangor,” he said quietly, watching the scene with wide eyes.

“What’s your _real_ name?” she snapped.

He hesitated, eyes growing even wider. Eventually, he said, “Aximili-Esgarrouth-Isthill.”

“Isthill?” she repeated. “Your mother’s name?”

“That’s… that’s how it’s done,” he said quietly. “How much did he tell you?”

“Everything,” said Loren.

“Why?”

Loren just snorted in reply.

Tobias looked back and forth between them, trying to sort out the conversation. “Okaasan,” he finally asked. “Is he… Is he my father?”

Loren nodded. If possible, Alex’s－ Aximili’s eyes may have grown even wider. “He… he nothlited?” Aximili asked. She nodded again. “For you?”

Loren shook her head. “A little less attitude, please?” she snapped.

“Sorry, I just… That would be…”

“Criminal? Obscene?” She shrugged. “There was no one to hold him responsible at the time. He thought he’d never see his kin again. I suppose he was right…”

“If that is how he felt… Why was he not with you?” asked Aximili. “How did Tobias not know… that… that Elfangor…”

“He left before I realized I was pregnant,” she said. “He thought there was something more important at stake.”

“What?” asked Tobias.

Loren shook her head and stood. “A war,” she said, dusting herself off.

“He was with the Independents?” asked Rachel.

“No.”

“Then what?” Tobias pressed, but his mother just shrugged. “You’re lying,” he snapped angrily.

“Yes, I am,” she said. “And you’ll put up with it.” She returned her attention to Aximili. “Do me a favor? Incinerate the corpse and go home.”

“I… cannot go home,” Aximili admitted.

“Then I guess stupid runs in the family,” she growled. She turned on her heel and stalked back off to the house.

With a groan, Tobias collapsed back on the dirt. “Now what?” he groaned. “She’s not gonna get any more helpful than that.”

Rachel shrugged. “If you want him incinerated, we could put him behind the engine.”

“Well, I certainly don’t want to cart him around for ages.” Tobias turned to Aximili. “What do you want to do?”

Aximili shrugged. “I suppose incineration is the best idea.”

Tobias propped up on his elbows. “No, I mean with yourself,” he said.

Aximili blinked in surprise, then looked aside. “I… I haven’t planned that far,” he admitted.

“Can you make yourself useful on a ship?” Tobias asked.

Aximili blinked again. “I… Yes,” he said. “I have been staff on starships before. A… technician.”

Rachel nodded. “I’ll talk to Jake,” she said, heading back to the ship. But then she stopped when she spied someone coming up the road. She pulled a pair of binoculars out of her pocket and found that it was Erek, heading back to them. She motioned to Tobias and Aximili. “Get that tucked behind the engine. I’ll go talk to King.”

She didn’t wait for them before heading back down the road. She met Erek halfway and looked him over pointedly, hand on her hip holster. “I thought you were leavin’,” she said.

“I needed time to think,” he said. He held out a mid-sized metal box to her. “This is a wide range of medical supplies designed to help with neurological disorders. I… I do believe I can use them properly. If… If you would like me to.”

Rachel raised an eyebrow. “You sure that’s what you wanna do?” she asked. “We’ll be taking more jobs on the wrong side of the law now and sticking to the Rim. It won’t be a good life.”

Erek just shrugged. “I’ve had my share of good lives,” he said.

－ －

Then…  
Cassie guided Rachel’s trembling and blood-covered body back inside the ranch house and into the first-floor bathroom. She sat Rachel on the toilet and started up a bath.

“Why are you being so nice?” Rachel asked quietly.

“What do you mean?” Cassie asked. “You need a bath. I’m starting a bath.”

“But I’ve been awful to you since I arrived here,” she said.

Cassie looked skeptically at Rachel over her shoulder. “You sayin’ you’d have left me out there if I’d run into him?” she asked.

Rachel shook her head. “I don’t want to think about that,” she said.

“That’s because you’re a lot more decent than you give yourself credit for,” Cassie assured her. She stepped back over to the toilet and helped Rachel pull off her bloody shirt. “Things have been rough. You want to be home. You’re as scared for her as she is for you. If it were me, I don’t think I’d be none too polite to the farm girl, either. But, I think, what you do when angry maybe isn’t so important as what you do after that’s burnt out.”

Slowly, Rachel nodded her head. Then, she admitted, “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

Cassie laughed. “That’s alright,” she assured her. “You should get out of the rest of those clothes. I’ll take this to the incinerator.”

Rachel nodded again, though Cassie wasn’t sure how much she’d actually absorbed. As Cassie turned back to the door, Rachel said, “Cassie?”

“Yeah?”

“Are we friends now?”

Cassie smirked. “Is this how you always make friends?” she asked.

Rachel rolled her eyes. “What, no one ever told you about the friendship murder parties on Persephone?”

Cassie laughed. Things were bad, but they’d be alright, in the end.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hontou baka da. = You're really an idiot.


End file.
